So life just got busy. On top of that, there was this damn reading slump. I figured we'd get together next week...and I'd try to make sure we had coffee together on a much more regular basis. But dear blog, I just had to talk to you this morning. See, I'm reading this book, Shadow Man, and it's really getting to me. It's one of those serial killer, psychological thriller type books. I've probably read hundreds of this type of book over my many years on the planet. But I've never had one get to me like this one.
Yes, it's incredibly intense. It's disturbing. In fact, it's just *too* disturbing. Last night as I was reading, I ended up in tears twice. The first time because of a brutal act aimed at one of the FBI agents, involving his pet. The second because of a packet of horrible, misogynist, ugly rantings printed from the Internet and sent to the FBI agents. But see, the thing is, this ugliness isn't gratuitous...it is a real part of the overall story. And the story is so compelling.
And this book is different from other thrillers I've read in that I'm so invested in the characters. Last night wasn't the first time I've cried while reading this book either. But the first time, I cried because of the internal pain of one of the characters. I'm not sure I've ever done that before. Cried during a book, well, sure. But not during this type of book. Which maybe says something about trying to simply categorize books into neat little categories. As I said, this book is just gut-wrenchingly disturbing...but it's so much more than that.
I feel like I'm being ripped in two...between loving this book and hating this book. I can't explain how that's even possible, but it's true. I have this overwhelming desire to just get this book out of the house...and yet I know that I can't possibly stop reading it now, I just have to know what happens to the characters. I really have to know.
So, is this book really so different from all the other psychological thrillers I've read in the past? Or am I a different reader than I used to be when this type of book was my normal fare? Perhaps it's both.
Anyway, thanks for listening, dear blog. Especially after how horribly I've been treating you lately.
I've done that with books before - sometimes you reach the end, and it all makes you glad you've read it - like you're a sadder, but wiser person, you know? Other times you get to the end and just feel like you ate too many cookies - like you're sick to your stomach and in retrospect really didn't even enjoy yourself. :/
ReplyDelete