Tuesday, October 12, 2010

ever so fickle

Yep, that's me. Seriously, I don't even know why I have this blog. I really don't.

Actually, when I started this new blog, it was a fresh start, with a new way of doing things. I had zero intention of even trying to do my pathetic version of a "review." Nope, I just wanted a place where I could record my daily observations on what I was reading. And that's how I started out.

Then as a few of my dear friends started reading it, well, I felt sort of stupid. I mean, who the hell wants to read that kind of rambly blathering. So I started going back towards the way I used to blog about books. Not exactly reviews, but something closer anyway.

Yeah, well here's the thing...I suck at writing "reviews." And I *hate* even trying! Yep, I hate it. I'm not insightful. And I'm not eloquent. And I never will be.

 But see, I still do love reading! And I love talking about what I'm reading. And I really want to go back to the way it was when I started this blog--where I just recorded what I'd read that day and what I thought about it.

I know that's not the kind of thing that anyone else will get much from. Really, I get that. So here's where I beg you not to feel like you have to read my blog out of any sense of obligation or anything of that sort!!!!!!!!!! I promise, promise, promise that I will not take it personally--I will not assume you don't like me as a person--I will not stop reading your blog!!!!

So yeah, this is one of many changes I'm making just for me.

See you at your blog, okay?

Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carroll.

It's not exactly that I had high expectations for this book/these books. More like I had high hopes. Hell, I knew there was a chance I wouldn't even like them. Ah, but those hopes...yeah, I really, really, really wanted to be utterly charmed and enchanted.

Didn't happen.

Sort of reflexively, I told myself that I might have fallen in love had I read them first as a child. But you know, I really don't think that's the case.

And it's not that I disliked these books at all. I didn't. I just didn't love them. Still, I am glad that I *finally* got around to reading them. Seriously, I wonder how many days one can make it through without running into some sort of Alice allusion. Just knowing that I will better understand those allusions alone makes it worth the time I spent reading it. I also really enjoyed all the word play...something I wasn't really expecting, but found sort of fun.

Pretty sure I won't be rereading it though. Unless it's with one of the boys, I guess. Now Alice in Sunderland by Bryan Talbot...that I'd love to reread one of these days. :)


  1. Several things.

    First, *I* want to read your "rambly blathering"

    Second, I think we must be some sort of soul twins as I go through this dilemma every time I want to blog and every time I actually do. Why can't we just forget about what other people think and just do what we want without having to worry or think about anything??

    Third, I'm sorry Alice didn't do it for you. I took a Carroll course my senior year of college and so studied him a lot. I love these books, but I often wonder if I love certain books because of how I read them. Not sure what I would have thought had I read them on my own or without any background, etc.

  2. Not gonna lie, sometimes a little rambling is refreshing. There are some days when I get home from working all day when rambling (writing it or reading it!) is about all my poor, enfeebled mind can handle. Think of bookish rambling as doing my sad, broken brain a favor. ;-)

    Blog however you want to, just don't leave me. *clings to your leg pathetically* =P

  3. Oh Debi, write what you want to write and forget the rest, seriously. I'm happy you made that decision.

    That being said I really love Alice myself, it's full of puns and questions logic like nothing else, it's not the kind of book whose characters you fall deeply in love with but I really love its ingenuity nevertheless. I actually even prefer Through the Looking Glass.

  4. I can't "review" worth a damn either that's why i put up Amazons review all the time.. hey I'm just not the type.. I will come here because i like reading whatever you talk about...I don't come out of obligation..really! I don't!

  5. Trish,
    I know...it's silly to even think about, isn't it? But for me, I think it's just pure guilt. I feel like my lovely friends are going to come and read my blog no matter what because they don't want to hurt my feelings. And because of that I feel like I ought to at least say something worth reading. But I just don't know how to do that, and I'm so tired of trying and failing. So, I'm just going to do what I want, and hope that people believe me when I say that it really *won't* hurt my feelings if they don't read it.
    You know, I think I likely would have enjoyed Carroll a lot more if I'd have read it for class, too. In fact, I'd sort of wished that I'd had an annotated version of these books because I really think I'd have gotten a lot more out of it that way.

    Never! Never would I leave you! You, my dear, add way too many smiles and downright snorts of laughter to my life for that! :D

    I preferred Through the Looking Glass, too. And like I said, it wasn't at all that I disliked them. And as I was just saying to Trish, I wish I'd have had an annotated version...and perhaps I'll look for one. I'm willing to bet I missed a lot.

    I love your reviews! I mean, I know you use Amazon for you summaries, but it's your thoughts about the book that I love reading! You must stop selling yourself short, dear friend!

  6. We love you and your words. You make me laugh! I wouldn't dream of stopping my visits. You keep me entertained! Reviews are becoming a bit of a struggle for me at the moment, I just don't enjoy writing them as much anymore.

  7. Debi--I hear you because I have the same thoughts go through my head. And I'll be honest and say that with no audience it can be a bit lonely, BUT we'll come and read your blog no matter what because we want to! You just have to trust that...right? And if we don't, it's our problem, not yours. :P Love you Debi...

  8. Guess what??? I read your blog for your ramblings!! I love your voice and what is going on in your world. I like to read your thoughts on books no matter what you may think of your reviews. I think many of us are too hard on ourselves. Frankly, that is why I keep using the easy review thing I got going on....I'm not eloquent and I don't go to the hidden layers within the book (probably because I never saw them in the first place...ha!!) So quit beating yourself up and stop putting so much pressure on yourself. I've eased up on my posts and review commitments. My resolution next year is blogging without obligation. I want to get back to reading for fun and not for pressure. So, stay true to you...that's why I read your blog girlie...you're real, honest, and so approachable!!!